My best writing is done with my eyes closed, my fingers tapping on the keys, the sound nearly rhythmic. I am most amused when I open my eyes to find that my fingers have been resting on the wrong keys and my writing makes absolutely no sense. Some days I challenge myself to translate the code my fingers left. I am lucky if I can make out a few words but generally it’s a waste of time. Thankfully, I find it rewarding (as ridiculous as this may sound) even when the words are lost, to try to recover the emotions I felt when I began to write. Openness and vulnerability and the memory of the music the mishmosh of letters made. At times I can be at peace with just that.
I close my eyes to concentrate, to block out the noise and the chaos that lingers in my head long after everyone has gone to sleep. I am a night writer. It is in the quiet of the night that I do my best work. In the night hours I am more likely to find those “right words” and as Jack Kerouac said, because they are the most simple. At 2.am., I am less likely to pressure myself. I am content with a few delicious words and a couple of good sentences. The wish to write something magnificent and meaningful is still there but it sits quietly on my shoulder and does not peck at my mind with any ferociousness.
There was a time not long ago when the possiblity of not creating some wonderful masterpiece stopped me from writing. I was filled with self doubt and wonder. Why write, I asked myself? Why bother with any creative pursuit as the odds of being recognized for any of it is minute? But with age and introspection came another simple understanding. I write because I can’t NOT write. I write because I want to make it acceptable to be open and vulnerable. I write because perhaps my stories will have meaning to to others and that someone will read my few simple words and not feel so alone in the dark hours of the night.
It is easy to find excuses to not do the things we have great passion for. Ask yourself why it is so difficult to take the first step? Write about it. And then commit yourself to a single baby step.www.marciareich.com & www.womenscoachingcenter.com
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